The problem that I have is that I think something negative and then that outweighs all of the positive, regardless of how positive it is. Once I’ve thought something it is very difficult to reason with that negative thought and then it just keeps going and going and going and its really really shit.  

The only reason that I get down about stuff is because I think it, not because somebody else has made me think it or something has triggered it, I literally sit here and think it and once I’ve started it doesn’t really stop because I don’t know how to make it stop.

Well, actually, one way is to write down exactly what is going through my head at the time, like I am right now, and that seems to do the trick. Mother is a psychotherapist and she has told me before that if ever somebody is down about something, for them to write down everything that is in their head, go outside and then burn it. Something along the lines of; your brain has consciously processed these thoughts, which is why recurring thoughts happen, and then the act of burning them means that these thoughts have been dealt with. 

I think I feel shit because I miss Lizzie and I saw something that turned out to be nothing at all and once again I was just assuming things, which makes me just feel awful.